It will take some effort but....You Can Change It!
The Front Tire Called 'TIME'
Think for a moment about how you invest time right now, and, in particular, what makes you decide to do what you do with it. You choose an action. Something drives the choice. Your environment maybe? Is it pain or pleasure? Is it obligation to another? Or a group?
This is your individual mix of values and motivations, and the mix will change as you move along through time. In our car analogy, you steer with this mix.
This is particularly true if you are beginning or transitioning to that time we call "Retirement". There will be considerable discomfort in this transition just as there was in earlier ones like childhood and adolescence and leaving the 'nest'. Some were a bit painful to all of us. If you are over age 50 and look ahead, even a little, we can see some fuzziness and fog ahead. It is an undiscovered country.
Yet, for some reason, it is almost certain that you will not plan sufficiently for Retirement. We know this because it is so common today among people who either just began to sense it coming or have been dealing with it ineffectively for awhile. Surveys on it are plentiful - the surveys are being done by people who know how to do the surveys and eliminate bias. (See https://retirementcoachesassociation.org/research) It adds a scientific body of data to an area that was only intuitively observable in the past. Research can convince people who won't listen otherwise to any kind of admonition or warning. And it gives us new tools to deal with the pain more effectively. That's the good news.
The bad news is that it is still hard to change and most people resist it until there is a crisis. My job is to help get it done and alleviate the pain. Your "Tow Truck" when needed, if you will.
How to Re...Tire...Time. You must Re...Think it, because Time Control is Elusive
Remember when you learned to drive? You needed feedback from your experience and it helped to have an instructor with you. It was important to adjust to the wheel AND your speed. You learned to build up habits that served you well. They became automatic.
But now you have a new map, a new car, and a new speed - perhaps new passengers. So you can build on some of the old habits, form new ones, and discard others. Learn how to do it and you can repeat the process of unlearning and learning - it gets easier. As with all projects, the hardest part is getting started. But where?
This is so important because you may try too hard - Start VERY VERY Small!
Pick only one time control habit to change, and do it early in the day.
Next, set aside time to relearn about your habits in a few minutes each morning.
You need a guide. Almost all assembly and repair instructions are on YouTube these days. Go there and see what you find that makes sense to you about time control. If you search Time Control Subliminal you will find some new ideas on it.
That gets you going, and when you can turn a problem into a process ultimately you will win out over the old patterns. To make the process lasting and constant, you will need some reference points in your research library. Suggestion: Make these two your first, and perhaps only, hard copy tools on habits:
First, a book called Stick With It by Author Sean Young, PhD, Director of the UCLA Center for Digital Behavior and the UC Institute for Prediction Technology. Here is the benefit: you can command lasting change, not the usual start and stop pattern which leads to ultimate discontent with your self, and little power to change anything.
Second, for a complimentary source of science based ideas that are simplified and easy to use: look here: https://www.selfication.com I guarantee you will enjoy this author, Patrick Edblad.
Add these to one or more of the Richard Leider (Repacking Your Bags) books mentioned last week and this should get you going on a sound basis that will last a long time. The process can help you make your wellspan and your lifespan last together much much longer. Your happiness too - the undiscovered country can have a lot of it.
Just do it!
Next week we'll change some Relationship concepts in Part 3. See you then!
Happy Days Ahead
Joe Grant, MBA
Certified Retirement Coach
Contact me for a Free 45 minute Consultation at https://yourvantagepoints.com
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